happy holidays

On the 7th day of Christmas, Q103 gave to me, a full bottle of chocolate syrup, on my head, then some whipped cream, of course, then the Rock Girl dumped feathers on my head and beat me with a pillow. I know that they are supposed to give me 7 Swans-a-Swimming, instead of Swans-a-Swimming, but as you can see, there are no swans in this video...

On the 5th day of Christmas, Q103 gave to me, 5 Onion Rings, to the face, if they had given me 5 Golden Rings I would of opened my mouth, so I could swallow them and keep them. I have been smashed in the face with food and beat in the head with a phone for Christmas, I don't know if these gifts are for me or for you, because I don't get to keep the things I get smashed in the face with, or beat in

On the 4th day of Christmas, Q103 gave to me a phone, not a smart phone, or a cell phone and not even a cordless phone, but a corded phone. I am both happy and proud to receive this gift from Q103, because I am pretty sure that I am the only person in America, receiving this gift, and it went straight to my head...

We the people at Q103, have been working hard to give you the 12 days of Christmas, we have been working hard to figure out what to smash me in the face with, it's hard because we can not smash me in the face with French Hens, so we use things like French Fries instead...

"The 12 Days of Christmas," is a very confusing song, because it begins on "The first day of Christmas," the song counts up to the 12th day, at the beginning of each verse but suddenly begins counting down, or is it just listing the gifts given on each day in reverse order...

This year, we the people of Q103, want to spread some holiday cheer, and I volunteered. Actually no one else was willing to do, what I am for you, so enjoy! and remember, there will be 11 more. Getting hit in the face with a plate full of pears is not all that bad, despite getting the sticky juice all over my face, it tasted good, so I can't complain, because porn stars have to deal with a lot wor

The Ramones "Merry Christmas (I Don't Want To Fight Tonight)" is the most under-appreciated Holiday songs of all time, and it's one of my favorites. If you have not heard this song before, it's because of a conspiracy. The Bah Humbug Conspiracy: In 1931, Herbert Hoover wanted everyone's Christmas to suck, he wanted people to get into fights, and break things around the house in order to

Netflix and chill to this hidden gem, "I Am Santa Claus" is a documentary featuring Mick Foley, and 4 other professional Santa Clauses, and once you see it, you can not un-see it, because the life of a professional Santa Clause, is not all milk & cookies. ...

This one time, I was watching "A Christmas Story" and Uncle Sam came to me, and was like "Dan you have to save Christmas, for America." You're welcome. That was 2 years ago, and it seems like it was just yesterday. 2 years later, and my copy of "A Christmas Story" does not work anymore, because I watched it too many times, and I moved out of my parents house, so my mo