I love the Olympics for two reasons: One reason is that it is proof that human beings love games and I find it inspiring that we still celebrate an ancient Greek tradition because it proves that the Greeks were good for something.

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If you're still reading this, or if you actually clicked on the link from our Facebook because I've noticed that no one really does that, then I would like to apologize for what I said about the Greeks.

The other reason why I love the Olympics is because of the women.

Volley Ball, Gymnastics, Diving, Soccer, Tennis, Table Tennis, Basketball, Track & Field, I don't care what it is, you put attractive athletic women in spandex I am there. One year my wife banned me from watching the Olympics because she overheard me saying something about how much I enjoy watching the Beach Volley Ball players brushing the sand off of each other.

You know.... after that comment I think I should ban myself from watching the Olympics.