You met this girl a few months ago and you've been trying to get with her ever since. When she finally goes out with you, you feel like you're going to explode. And then before you know it, the good night kiss turns into a good morning romp between the sheets.


She leaves and you're pretty confident. You've never had a problem before. Girls dig what you've got to offer. But then you overhear your buddy's sister, who introduced you, telling your buddy your date was less than impressed with your bedroom shenanigans.

Wait … What? How can that be? All the other girls you've been with said you were okay. Some even said you were good! And you've listened to every pointer every one of them has ever given you! What gives?

Well, the place to start is the girls you've been with before. If you're still on good terms with them, and are comfortable discussing such things, ask them to be honest with you about your sexual prowess.

If you aren't on good terms with them, I'd suggest just asking the girl you were with if you can get her to pick up the phone. Or her friend. But do not, whatever you do, ask a girl who hates you. Some of us ladies are the vindictive sort.

Probably, the issue isn't you, per se. More likely, the issue is that the woman you're with just likes different things than the women you've been with.

It makes sense, right? I like Dr. Pepper, but my buddy, who is a girl, hates soda. I like to read horror and thriller novels, and another of my female friends reads strictly romance and erotica. My sister's favorite color is pink, and these days I'm leaning toward lime green. Before that, my favorite color was purple.

Our tastes are different in every way they can be. Sure, some of us share some of the same likes and dislikes. But overall, we're so widespread on every single thing in this world, it would make less sense if everyone in the world liked the same kinds of sex.

I know I've said this before, but I can't stress it enough. Whether it's a one-night stand, or the beginning of a lasting relationship, if you talk to your partner and find out what they like before and during, you will have no reason to question, at the very least, your effort.

It's always possible you're just not sexually compatible. I'm told it happens. But I believe that's usually a case of miscommunication – or no communication at all. Psychic ability does not come with the freeware version of life. Or so I'm told.

How often do you meet a woman at a club, concert or bar, take her home and ask her what she's into? If the answer's, “Every time!” you go, boy! Where the hell were you when I was single? Not that I'm looking to trade-up, mind. It just would have been awesome to meet more guys (and girls) who understood that what makes them feel good doesn't always make their partner feel good. And that's okay! You just gotta figure out what does.

Finally, practice. They don't say “Practice makes perfect!” for nothing. If you can't practice with the last girl, practice with the next. If you're between girls for a while, read about technique. In books and on websites by women, not men. Other men can only tell you what women react to, and if they've got it wrong, you're ass out. And what better subject to study than one of pleasure?

Whatever you do, don't just sit there feeling sorry for yourself because some girl says you suck in bed. Do something about it. You'll thank me for it in the long run


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