I thought that Tulip Fest was this weekend because my wife insisted on getting my mom her Mother's Day present a month early.

For some reason this reminds me of a funny story that takes place in Washington Park.

Many years ago, when I was 16, my friends and I embarked on a epic quest from Latham to Albany. Our quest was simple and noble: We were going to see "King Arthur" at the Washington Park Playhouse and somehow get beer. Not that we needed the beer, because one of my friends had brought small bottles of soda that were mostly vodka.

One of friends had a brilliant plan. He found a homeless man who was kind enough to buy us beer if we let him have three of the beers. The homeless man was able to purchase the beers with ease and for his trouble, my friends and I rewarded the homeless man with four beers instead of three.

My friends and I took the beer deep within Washington Park, where we found a picnic table and started drinking. I thought that I was cool, so I drank four of the beers and one of the vodka-infused sodas.

I don't recall much after that.

I remember puking in front of a pizza shop on Lark Street and hiccuping for three hours before "King Arthur." I don't remember anything from the play because I spent most of the time laying on a blanket and drinking water in attempt to get rid of the damn hiccups, while one of my friends kept insisting I smoke one of his cigarettes.

Long story short, eventually I had that cigarette after I puked all over a tree just a few feet away from where people were sitting on the grass watching the play.

Apparently I was a bigger attraction then "King Arthur."

Moral of the story: Only drink what you can handle and we can pay people in beer to get beer.

Oh the '90s!